You guys: what is up with Here Comes Honey Boo Boo? I can't take it. I finally tuned in tonight to see what all the fuss was about and W.O.W.
In the one episode I just watched, I saw:
*a staggering stockpile of toilet paper
*a pet piglet poop itself on a kitchen table (<----------*shudder*)
*a baby shower being thrown for a girl who looks 12
*a dirty tarp become a "red neck" slip-n-slide
*WAY too many subtitles for people who are speaking English
*a crusty brown dirt ring inside a roll of neck-fat. (Ring around the skin-collar?)
I got dry mouth from gaping for the full thirty minutes.
And now I'm having so many feelings:
*sad about the state of television
*sad about teenage pregnancy
*sad about obesity
*sad about bad grammar
*sad about children's beauty pageants
*thirsty (due to the dry mouth)
*great about my own life
That's why we watch these reality shows, right? To feel better about ourselves? We all have our own train-wreck moments--we're just lucky to not have a camera crew following us around 24/7 catching the action. I can think of a handful of things that happened to me just last week that would've been MORTIFYING had they been caught on camera**. Some things are just meant to be private***.
**I'll give you one: You know when you feel a tickle on your arm and you look down to make sure it's not a bug? And 99.9999999% of the time it's a stray hair or the wind or your imagination? Well, the other day while I was ON THE FREEWAY, I had that tickle moment and looked down only to see a SPIDER CRAWLING ON MY ARM. It was a tiny spider but I had a seizure-esqe conniption worthy of a hairy tarantula and almost crashed.
***Like when your pig poops on the table. Maybe keep that under wraps.
This chicken/rice dish was its own train wreck the first 3 times I made it. I'm usually not so loyal to a dish that disappoints me but I knew there was something good in there worth fighting for. I think I've got it now--it just needed some more deliberate doctoring (AKA, seasoning). No one likes it bland. That's why we like the reality TV. God help us.
Coriander Chicken with Coconut Rice
adapted from Tyler Florence's Chicken and Coconut "Paella"
The key to making this dish great is a lot of seasoning along the way. You'll need more salt and lemon juice than seems normal but trust me, those two things bring out all the other flavors so perfectly!
2T roasted ground coriander (find this in a regular grocery store's spice aisle)
8 boneless, skinless chicken thighs (about 3 lbs. total)
3T coconut oil, divided
1 medium yellow onion, minced
2T minced fresh ginger
2 bay leaves
2 cups white basmati rice, rinsed and drained
grated zest of 2 lemons
14 oz. light coconut milk (one can)
10 oz. chicken broth
1 cup frozen green peas
juice of one lemon
3 big handfuls arugula (or to taste)
small handful fresh mint leaves, chiffonade-cut
extra virgin olive oil
fresh lemon juice
salt and pepper
Preheat the oven to 400. Pat the chicken dry with paper towels, season with lots of salt and pepper and then rub generously with the coriander on both sides. Heat 2T of the coconut oil in a dutch oven over medium-high heat on the stovetop and brown the chicken in batches, about 3-4 minutes per side until a nice brown crust forms. Transfer to a plate and set aside. Throw the remaining 1T oil into the pan and then add the onion, ginger and bay leaves (and a big pinch salt & pepper), cooking until the onion is soft and translucent, about 5 minutes. Add the rice (and another big pinch salt & pepper) and stir until all the grains are coated in oil. Add the coconut milk, chicken broth and lemon zest and bring to a simmer, scraping the bottom of the pan for any (delicious) brown bits that have accumulated. Nestle the chicken into the rice and place in the lower half of the oven, uncovered, until the rice is cooked through and creamy, about 30 minutes. Out of the oven, remove the bay leaves, stir in the frozen peas (they'll heat through in a flash) and the juice of one lemon.
To serve, top each serving of the hot chicken and rice with a big handful of arugula, a sprinkling of mint, a big squeeze of lemon, a drizzle of olive oil and salt/pepper. Serve with extra lemon wedges and mint on the side.
Jolie Boo Boo