Wednesday, September 12, 2012

an on-set primer





*One minuscule, paper-thin smidgen of onion will make your trailer rank for 12 hours. Act accordingly.

*Be kind to people.

*Remember names.

*Bring your own makeup in the event that after getting your make up "professionally" done, you need to remedy a situation in which one (or more) of your eyes appears droopy and/or lazy.

*If someone accuses you of tampering with said "professional" makeup? Deny.  It.

*Make friends with the people who make you look good. They have a lot of power...to not make you look good.

*Shoes that feel surprisingly comfy during a 90-second costume fitting will most certainly give you wicked blisters and lower back pain by late morning on day one. Bring along a spare pair of your own orthopedics.

*Try not to eat out of boredom. Craft service is the work of the devil.

*Retain your self-respect, even when you're spending the better part of your day alone in the space equivalent to a jail cell (complete with exposed toilet).

*Make sure your trailer door is locked before you use the exposed toilet.

*Be prepared at any moment for small talk, to be completely ignored or for an unexpectedly deep and meaningful conversation.

*Bring your laptop so you can create cheesy, spontaneous trailer photo shoots featuring your (bad) wardrobe***.


***The Catskills called: they're missing a jacket.  (a mad shout out to the mock-turtleneck.)


xoxo,
jolie


P.S. Speaking of the Catskills, remember this post??

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