say yes to yourself

Friday, October 19, 2012

Are you going through something tough? 
Are you suffering from transitional growing pains?
Is your heart heavy?
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, you may need to say yes to yourself.

How to say yes to yourself:

  • Listen.
  • Breathe.
  • Have solitude.
  • Notice nature.
  • Sit in the feelings, even the hard ones.
  • Say no to others when it doesn't feel right.
  • Find music that feeds you and moves you and supports you.
  • Unapologetically buy an US Weekly and give yourself over to it.
  • Cry.
  • Cry in public--vulnerability is a gift that allows others around you to not only feel compassion, but touch their own vulnerability.
  • Find humor in it somehow (even if it's laughing at how crazy puffy you look after crying/crying in public).
  • Be kind to others (small talk is okay).
  • Spend time with a two-year-old.
  • Be open to your life looking a completely different way than you thought it ever would.  Or should. Or could.
  • Trust that it might be even better than you ever imagined.
  • Know when to talk about it to others and when to be quiet about it.
  • Find small things (a strong cappuccino, a favorite scarf) that make you happy and exploit those.
  • Never underestimate retail therapy.
  • Let others take care of you.
  • Know you can take care of you too. And do it.
  • Remember how strong you're capable of being.
  • Walk.
  • Run.
  • Kiss a dog.
  • Let a dog kiss you.
  • Know that (somehow) this too shall pass.
  • Meditate...and while you're in there:
  • Ask for support.
  • Ask for clarity.
  • Ask for guidance.
  • Call your friends.
  • Call your mom.
  • Turn off your phone.
  • Bake and give it away.
  • Bake and eat it all.
  • Keep busy.
  • Do nothing and let that be okay.
  • Take responsibility for helping to create your transition--celebrate that! On some level you are asking for MORE from life--that is a powerful place to be.
  • Be open to receiving it.
  • Look for messages wherever you go--Abraham says the universe is knocking itself out to give you what you want, you just have to be expecting it.
  • Lean into a good feeling when one presents itself.
  • Remember: "If you're going through hell, keep going." --Winston Churchill
  • It's okay to sometimes pretend things are better than they are.  They will be soon.
  • Learn to discern what your soul needs.**
  • Make lists of blessings.
  • Make lists of people who love you.
  • Make lists of people who you love.
  • Make lists of things that move you.
  • Make a list like this to make yourself feel better.
  • Post it to a blog and hope it makes someone else feel better.


**My dear friend Holly once said this to me: "Sometimes the best thing for your soul is gorging on chocolate and watching bad TV and other times it really needs you to go out into the backyard barefoot, pick an orange right off the tree, eat it while siting on the porch and then wash your sticky hands off with the hose."


  1. Huh. Who knew you were really a wise sage hiding out as an actor. Lovely piece here Jolie (sans the US magazine bit).

  2. love this post - thanks for your insight and wisdom.

  3. I wish you well. And I sure do believe we are getting tapped on the shoulder when we are careening around in our lives - just too many coincidences to be coincidences. Love the orange and hose imagery.

  4. I love your blog, and I love this post. I hope you don't mind that I linked to it from my Facebook - I have a lot of friends in transition right now. I found your blog through a link on Posie Gets Cozy, and I'm so glad I did!

    1. Thanks, Michelle!:) Share away! We all need a reminder of these things from time to time, right? xo

  5. I just found your lovely blog and this post, in particular, has been so helpful to me, I can't even articulate. Thank you. x

  6. This is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing.


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