You Guys!!
Happy Autumn! (Or, for all you LA peeps out there, Happy Autumn? It might be 90 degrees tomorrow so let's not get too excited.) What is going ON, my darlings?!?! I'm so sorry I've been so MIA. I feel like we are long lost friends in need of a serious catch-up:

How did the:
family reunion/birthday party/doctor's appointment/visit with your father turn out?

Was it:
fun/scary/awful/better that you expected?

And I heard that you:
conquered breast-feeding/got back into your skinny jeans/spoke your truth/booked that job!
You are a freaking rock star. I knew you could do it.

Hey! I saw that facebook picture of your:
happy puppy/cute baby/recent vacation/new glasses.
I approve.

And, whoa: did you hear about You-Know-Who?! They finally you-know-what! Can you believe it? It's nuts.

Ok. I feel a little better:)

My spare time lately has been sucked dry by Poshmark. Do you know about this? It's a clothing buying/selling app that is completely addicting. You can browse other women's "closets" and list your own items for people to check out. You know those clothes/bags/jewelry items that were expensive that you hardly ever wear? That might even still have their tags attached? That you can't bear to give to Goodwill? Poshmark is perfect for them. It's way faster than Ebay when it comes to listing items (you do it right from your phone), it's easy to search for things (you can filter by your sizes), and Poshmark emails you the shipping labels so you don't have to deal with weighing items and estimate shipping. Here is my closet! And here is a great post that gives the full Poshmark low-down if you're interested.

This week I also became completely obsessed with making popcorn the old-fashioned way via stovetop. (How did we get hoodwinked into thinking chemical-laden microwave popcorn was so much better? It's not even that much more convenient.) I got this brilliant idea to formulate a pumpkin-pie flavored version and began tinkering around with recipes, then on a whim I did a google search only to find out I was not in fact the inventor of this idea. Oh, well. You know what softened my disappointment? Eating it. And then shopping on Poshmark.

Pumpkin Spiced Popcorn
makes about 15 cups (WAY too much for one person although it's not impossible)

2 T coconut oil
3/4 cups organic popcorn kernels
1/2 stick (4T) butter, melted
3 T brown sugar
2 t pumpkin pie spice
1/2 t fine sea salt

Melt the butter and set aside. In a separate small bowl, mix together the sugar, pumpkin pie spice and salt and set aside. In a large, heavy-bottomed pot with high sides and a well-fitting lit, heat the coconut oil and 3 popcorn kernels over medium heat. Cover. When the oil becomes hot enough to pop the three kernels, add the rest of the popcorn, cover again and continue to cook, shaking the pot from side to side (holding the lid on) every 10 seconds. This insures even kernel heating. When the popping slows down, take the pot off the heat and continue shaking until popping stops. Toss with the melted butter first, stirring to coat the kernels as evenly as possible, then add the sugar/spice/salt mixture, shaking or tossing to distribute. Try not to eat the entire bowlful.

xo
jolie

P.S. I feel like we should remake this Portlandia sketch but with pumpkin spice instead of birds. Put pumpkin spice on it!

P.P.S. Welcome new email subscribers! I like you! I'm so glad you're here!

turkey mutt loaf casserole (with special guest Lena)

As the canine star of Joeycake, it's really an honor to have you here today in more than just cute pictures, Lena. Thank you so much for joining me!

Um....Have you met me? I'm pretty much joining you every day under the desk here. 

Yes, but I'm so glad you've allowed me to interview you for this home-cooked dog food post.

HELLO, did somebody say FOOD?

Yep. I did. How are you liking the food I've been cooking for you lately?

Wowee! That stuff's good! I like digging my snout in there A LOT. And my tail's been super tired lately. 

From all the wagging?

You got it.

I notice that right after eating, before your epic all-day nap, you do a victory lap around the house. What's that about?

I gotta see what I missed while I was eatin'.

I see. So, which dishes have you enjoyed the most?

The one with the meat. Oh, and that other one with the meat.

Confession: I sometimes slip fresh parsley in there to give you fresh breath.

Say what?

And I also sneak lots of veggies in there and whole grains and even apple cider vinegar so you can live a long time and be healthy.

 Huh. Ok......but there's meat in there too, right?

Yes, there's meat. Don't worry about it. I've got you covered.

Hey, do you mind if I lie down while we have this conversation? And maybe close my eyes?

No, go for it. So, I notice that anytime I'm in the kitchen now you think I'm cooking for you. 

Aren't you?

Not so much. We need to work on that. Your begging has become supreme.

Thanks! Hey, next time you're in there can you make me my favorite Blueberry dessert?

Don't push it.

Turkey Mutt Loaf Casserole
adapted from Feed Your Best Friend Better by Rick Woodard
makes about 12 cups

Ok. Listen. This is happening: I've become a person that cooks for her dog. If you know me this shouldn't surprise you since a) I'm kinda weird, b) I like to feed everybody, and c) Lena has always appreciated my cooking. Oh, and d) I need more things to do (not).

Our sweet Lena girl is about 12 now and has begun to have some health issues that come with aging. All this time we've been feeding her a good, organic dry food but lately I felt compelled to research feeding her some home-cooked grub. After learning what a dog needs nutritionally and how to use food to treat/tame certain conditions, I decided to experiment feeding her a variety of high-quality foods (and adding liquid vitamins, minerals and fish oil) to see if we can extend her quality of life and also avoid illness and all the costs that come along with it--monetary and emotional. It's definitely a little more time consuming but if you're already in the kitchen cooking for yourself, no biggie. This is mega-easy with only two steps: mixing and cooking. And confession: It's really good. I'm not ashamed to say on more than one occasion I've scooped myself out a large corner portion with toasty edges, added some salt and pepper (and a fork) and eaten alongside her. Yes, I eat dog food (see a).

Cooking spray
3 eggs, lightly beaten
2 1/2 t dried oregano
2 1/2 t dried thyme
1/2 t garlic powder
1 T soy sauce or tamari
1 T worcestershire sauce
1/4 cup finely chopped parsley
3/4 cup shredded parmesan cheese (or any cheese, really)
1 28oz can crushed tomatoes
3 lbs ground turkey
3 cups rolled oats

Preheat the oven to 375F. Spray a large glass or metal lasagna pan (mine is 15x10x2) with cooking spray and set aside. In a large bowl, beat the eggs and then add the oregano, thyme, garlic powder, soy sauce, worcestershire and parsley. Mix well. Add the cheese and tomatoes and mix again. Add the turkey and oats and get your hands in there to combine thoroughly. Pour/spread the mixture into the prepared baking dish evenly and bake for about 40 minutes or until a thermometer inserted into the middle comes to 170F. Turn the broiler on high and blast the top for about 5-6 minutes (watch it carefully!) until it gets browned and toasty. Cool before serving and refrigerate or freeze the leftovers. Each 1 cup serving of this contains just over 300 calories*.

*Rick has caloric guidelines in his book to help you figure out how much to feed your pooch. For example, Lena is about 60 pounds and should have 1000-1200 cals/day, depending on her activity level. So I've been experimenting with giving her part high-quality dry food and part home-cooked grub, making sure she gets her caloric needs met.

P.S. Don't ever feed your dog onions! And they need very little salt. (Here's a full list of dangerous foods for dogs.) And BTW I'm no expert, just a dog lover. Talk to your vet about your pooch's diet.

xoxo
Jolie and Lena

missed connections/vegan carrot coconut soup

Missed Connections (by Joeycake)

*You were the three-piece-suit-wearing dandy on the corner of Santa Monica and Vine last Wednesday. I thought you were pretty formally dressed, seeing how you were three sheets to the wind before 9am. You were high-stepping and shouting gibberish, seemingly just for me. I was the one in the dirty Prius, waiting at the red light, hurrying to lock my doors. Remember when you did an actual jazz square while holding my gaze? Due to the fact that I was operating a motor vehicle, I wasn't able to get my phone out fast enough to safely capture photo and/or video of your exceptional shenanigans. I'm kicking myself for this now.



*I was the intrepid actress who prepared for hours, got off book, curled her hair and drove across town in rush-hour traffic to audition for your high-profile project. You were the Important Casting Director who decided to leave the room and let your assistant take over the taping duties right before my turn. Not to be a stickler? But your name did appear on my official appointment email. So you kinda shoulda been there. But it's cool. I'm sure you've been extensively training your 19-year-old assistant to give thoughtful adjustments and hold the camera without shaking it.



*You were the special of the day: the short-rib panini on buttered, toasted fresh country bread with caramelized onions and horseradish aioli. I saw your melty self being delivered to the lucky bastard in front of me in line. I seriously considered you but then, sadly, was the orderer of the bland salad. What can I say? I was trying to be chaste and carb-free. And where did it leave me? Just obsessively thinking of you later (all day, really, and part of the next). Not sure if you'll be there when I return, but a girl can dream.



*You were the main electrical board inside my fancy European clothes washer. I was just a gal, minding her own business, trying to wash a load of whites when you short-circuited. Not cool, main electrical board, not cool. You left me high and dry. Literally. And while I tried to be optimistic about replacing you, you had to play hard-to-get. I know, you're in Europe, you need time to get here, blah blah. But it seems like "two weeks minimum" is an awful long time. Not digging your laid back Euro attitude. Frankly, I think you're playing dirty. How ironic.



*You were a bag of carrots. I'd been looking past you for a week. There were more seductive things in the fridge, like white wine. And the extra short-rib panini I bought to have leftovers. I was the one who needed soothing after a particularly frustrating audition experience. And also after pulling my groin from stepping over heaps of dirty laundry. Did you see me? I clutched an onion and a knob of ginger while limping over to you, hoping you could grab your coconut friends and we could all make a connection...



Vegan Carrot Coconut Soup
serves 8

4 T coconut oil
8 cups peeled and diced carrots (about 2.5 pounds)
1 large onion, chopped
3 medium cloves garlic, minced
3 T minced fresh ginger
sea salt
6 cups vegetable broth
2 cups unsweetened coconut milk beverage (I used Trader Joe's brand in the carton)
zest and juice of 1 medium lime
toasted shredded coconut for serving (optional)

In a large soup pot, heat the coconut oil over medium heat. Add the carrots, onion, ginger, garlic and a good pinch of salt. Sauté, stirring occasionally, until fragrant and soft, about 10 minutes. Add the broth and bring to a simmer for about 25 minutes or until carrots are very tender. Add the lime zest. Transfer to a blender in batches to puree. Return the smooth soup to the pot, add the lime juice and coconut milk. Heat thoroughly and taste for salt. Add a little more broth if you want a thinner consistency.  Serve with a sprinkling of sea salt and a few shreds of toasted coconut if you wish.

xoxo
jolie

P.S. how to do a jazz square